I know you’ve all been told at least once that you shouldn’t go to college in a relationship. It works for some, not for others. I didn’t enter college with a significant other, but I had close friends who did. And I watched them stress out over missed calls or calls that never came, long distance situations, and planning visits throughout the year. I’m not saying it can’t be done, I’m just saying, it’s a lot of work. And a huge distraction that you don’t need your first year on new territory.
Fast-forward a little bit. You didn’t enter college with a boo, but you somehow acquired one along the way. And I know you’re probably thinking, “OMG, this is so perfect!” And you two are spending all your free time together, having dinner together on campus, he’s coming to your dorm, you’re going to his. Everything is great…until you look up and realize that you’ve missed two assignments and have a test coming up!
Ok, it may not be that much of a distraction, but for some people it can be just that. I’ve been in one relationship for most of my college experience, and it’s been the most amazing journey. But in that I can also say how easy it can be to become distracted, even with an amazing partner pushing and encouraging you along the way.
The biggest piece of advice I can give you is to not lose sight of what’s most important. It’s not the relationship, it’s you and your progression. Above all else, make sure you’re constantly pouring into yourself as an individual, or you’ll be of no use in your relationship.
In the past four years of being in a relationship, I’ve realized, depending on the partner that you have, it can be very beneficial to your overall success in school and your personal life. I had a partner who constantly pushed me to be my best self and to get out of my comfort zone, and I encouraged the same. Despite social media, relationships aren’t always #Goals, it takes work. And if you’re not careful, trying to maintain that and obtain a degree can be a bit much.
I’ve never thought it impossible to have and show equal amounts of dedication to both, you just need to know what you’re getting into.
If you’re in a long-term relationship and you’re on the path to getting that degree, stay focused! That’s the biggest piece of advice that I have to give. It’s so easy to lose sight and not even realize it until you begin to see the results of those things that you stopped giving attention and dedication to.
We’re going to always have to juggle things in life, whether it be work and school, a relationship and school; kids, a husband, AND work. We have to juggle it all. But you can! We’re built for it. But in the midst of it all, don’t forget about you.